Loss and Family

Losing a family member is one of the hardest parts of life and when you get that call the world stops in that moment.

In the last 12 months we have lost 3 people in our families, and made the trip back home to attend funerals and say goodbye. One of the hardest things about the military is being so far away when that call comes in but it also gives you lots of time to reflect while coming home.

The blessing in loss is getting all of the family together in one place to reminisce about your loved one and seeing people you haven't seen in a long time. Loss is also a time to take stock in your life and sometimes like in my case realizing that holding a grudge or not making enough time for family has to change.

I am so very thankful for all of the family I have in my life, the family I was born with and also the family i have gained over the years.

I am so BLESSED!

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Bible

My bible is one I have had since 2005 and is a Mom's devotional bible, it has all kinds of great devotionals geared toward moms.  It has lots of marked pages and papers stuffed in places that I want to remember, but today as I was spending time with God I had a thought.  


When I finished I zipped my Bible cover up and put it on the night stand so it would be there for tomorrow.  As I did this I wondered is this how I see God and his word?  Something that I can just pull out for my obligatory "time" and then zip it up and walk away until tomorrow?  


We are so blessed to have a book that talks to us of God's love and everything we need to know about how to live a God like life, but we are so wasteful and take it for granted.  So whatever you study in your time with God carry it with you through out the day and remind yourself of the words God shared with you.  My prayer comes from Psalms 51 and is what I long for in my quest to live a life for my God.  


"Create in me a pure heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me. Do not cast me from your presence or take your Holy Spirit from me. Restore to me the joy of your salvation and grant me a willing spirit, to sustain me." Psalms 51:10-12

Father Daughter Ball

Daddy took his little princesses to a dance last night and they had an AMAZING time :)



THESE ARE MY BLESSINGS :)

Zoom Out

In the last two days I have really had something pounded into my head.  God had a point to make to me and was going to make sure I got it so here goes.  


ZOOM OUT! Look at the bigger picture, you have no idea what is going on around you and your judgmental attitude has to go.  I know it sounds a little nuts to some when somebody says "God is really speaking to me", but I am telling you he speaks often.  Sometimes he does so in a quiet manner and other times he opens up and really lets you have it.  Yesterday at PWOC our devotional was about loving others and that love being unconditional.  Then today a friend of mine posted a prayer on facebook that again was about "zooming out" and taking in all the info before making snap judgments.  
Here is the Prayer:

Best Prayer I have Heard In A Long Time...

"Heavenly Father, Help us remember that the jerk who cut us off in traffic last night is a single mother who worked nine hours that day and is rushing home to cook dinner, help with homework, do the laundry and spend a few precious moments with her children.

Help us to remember that the pierced, tattooed, disinterested young man who can't make change correctly is a worried 19-year-old college student, balancing his apprehension over final exams with his fear of not getting his student loans for next semester.

Remind us, Lord, that the scary looking bum, begging for money in the same spot every day (who really ought to get a job!) is a slave to addictions that we can only imagine in our worst nightmares

Help us to remember that the old couple walking annoyingly slow through the store aisles and blocking our shopping progress are savoring this moment, knowing that, based on the biopsy report she got back last week, this will be the last year that they go shopping together

Heavenly Father, remind us each day that, of all the gifts you give us, the greatest gift is love. It is not enough to share that love with those we hold dear. Open our hearts not to just those who are close to us, but to all humanity. Let us be slow to judge and quick to forgive, show patience, empathy and love."

1John 4: 7-8 
7 Dear friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. Anyone who loves is a child of God and knows God.8 But anyone who does not love does not know God, for God is love.


I only posted two of the verses but 1John 4:7-21 is all about loving others.  

Why??

**WARNING Late Night Ramblings**

As I sit here and can't sleep there are a million thoughts bouncing around in my head and this is one that has me completely boggled.

Why is it that we as Christians cannot be happy for one another?  I mean when someone comes out with a blessing there is always someone sitting in the corner grumbling because it didn't happen to them.  I have been guilty of this as I know most people have been.  Have you begrudged someone their blessing because it came at a time when you were having a rough time and needed to see God move in your life?  I know that in my selfish moments when things were piling on top of me and I felt as though I couldn't breathe because of the pressure the thought crossed my mind "WHY NOT ME GOD".

Honestly this boils down to one of the biggest struggles I have personally and that is having faith in God and his timing.  I am a worrier no ifs ands or buts I worry about everything it drives my husband crazy because I cannot seem to settle myself at times.  I want to have so much faith in the Lord and what he is doing in my life that when someone else shares the blessings in their's that I can be completely and genuinely happy for them.

Matthew 6:34 NIVTherefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.

LOVE

Today is the day of love the day we are all supposed to take a moment and appreciate our loved ones.  I am not going to sit here and say blah blah blah over commercialized blah blah blah, because I like feeling EXTRA special and getting little things from my husband.  Nick doesn't only do this on Valentines day but we do celebrate this holiday.

I am so thankful for all the people in my life and that my heart is so full of love.  My children were so excited with their little gifts this morning and couldn't wait to give their friends the little valentines they had made.  Haley wrote her own name on all of her cards and Hannah wrote her own valentine for Nick and I telling us how thankful she was for us.  Hannah telling us that she was thankful for us and that she thanks God that he chose us as her parents makes me feel so blessed, as she gets older I am constantly so proud of her and who she is becoming. (Although I wish she would stop growing so I could keep them little)

So on this day of Love and Appreciation I am so thankful for all of the wonderful people God has put in my life :)

BE STILL!

Psalm46:10 “Be still, and know that I am God!  I will be honored by every nation. I will be honored throughout the world."

This one verse is so powerful and so commanding, just BE STILL and KNOW that I AM GOD! Be still what does that mean is it a literal stop moving or more figurative? For me personally it could say BE QUIET because I am constantly talking even when my mouth isn't moving my brain is running. I struggle daily with listening to God, he will tell me something and I will automatically be "well okay, but what if" or "how" I never just take the time to listen and absorb. Even in my quiet time which I struggle to make a priority I talk and talk to God but don't listen to the answers.

Be STILL, block out the things of this world, the worry, doubt, and distractions and really ABSORB that he is GOD. We all know in our minds that he is God, but in the deepest recesses of your heart do you really KNOW that he is GOD and that he has you? I don't, I wish I could say I did but I don't have that peace, today that is what I long for a knowledge in the deepest darkest parts of my soul that HE IS GOD and HE'S GOT THIS!

Puzzle Pieces

I am SO THANKFUL that I have a God who meticulously puts this puzzle together I call my life. Everything that happens happened exactly when it was supposed to and no matter how cliche it sounds I truly believe everything happens for a reason.

Jeremiah 29:11 NIV
For I know the plans I have for you," declares the lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

This all came to me even clearer last night when I was laying in bed, snuggled up with the love of my life. After almost 9 years together I cannot express how thankful I am that God chose this man for me. We really are a perfect match, that is not to say our relationship is perfect because that is definitely not always the case. Through the years though we have had our struggles and very hard times but even when we couldn't see it God was making our relationship stronger.

Ok that is my lovey dovey stuff for today I couldn't wait til Valentines Day :)

Song of Solomon 3:4 "I have found the one my heart loves."

Appearance of my Heart

1 Samuel 16:7 "The Lord does not see as man sees; for man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart."

I have just started the bible study "Facing the Giants" by Max Lucado, and in the second chapter he is discussing that even though David was the "runt of the litter" God told Samuel he was the "ONE" and to anoint him as king.

I keep reading and re-reading the verse that is at the top of this blog and at the same time it gives me peace that God is not superficial it is scary because what does my heart look like? I want a beautiful God filled heart, I want a humble faithful heart that longs to be God like. Even though these are my desires is this really what I am achieving though?

My goal from today forward is to have a heart that God would desire to have me serve him in whatever capacity. I want God to look at me and see a heart like David's, faithful and completely focused on God.

Another quote that stuck out to me in my reading today was this

Focus on Giants-you stumble

Focus on God-your giants tumble

"Lift your eyes, giant-slayer. The God who made a miracle out of David stands ready to make one out of you." Max Lucado

Taking God Daily

This post may make no sense to anyone but it is bouncing around in my head so I am going to write it down.

You know that Mucinex commercial, the one with the gross looking mucas dude who moves in his whole family and the only thing that can help is taking the medicine.

Well these are the images in my head, Satan is like a big gross mucas looking guy who moves into your head with all his friends and family.  Self doubt, worry, anger, grief, insecurity and so on.  The only way to fight these diseases is to TAKE GOD DAILY!  Staying in the word and spending time everyday with God is the only "medicine" that can completely heal whatever is ailing you, God is the almighty healer he can change the way you think about yourself and ease all your worries.  This is not to say that it will be easy as soon as you get into the word and that Satan will move him and all his buddies out, but this is a WAR you cannot fight on your own.  So TAKE GOD DAILY and believe that he is the ULTIMATE HEALER!

Job 11: 17-18       17 Life will be brighter than noonday, and darkness will become like morning. 18 You will be secure, because there is hope; you will look about you and take your rest in safety.

Snow, Snow and oh more SNOW!!!

As I sit here we are expecting yet another round of snow, there is still about 6" on the ground with ice underneath.  I'm not a big fan of all this snow it has kept us in the house and Hannah out of school for 4 days, the roads are yucky there is lots of slushy stuff out there now.  The girls are completely ready for some normalcy back in their lives and the routine that school and our other everyday activities provide.  Yesterday we spent some time outside and they enjoyed playing on top of the snow because it was so packed down they couldn't really play in it.

Things I am thankful for today:  We never lost power, Nick is home this year to experience the bad weather with us, and for the most part the girls have gotten along pretty well.  The biggest blessing I can see at the moment is that we have been blessed with such a great life here that I cannot wait to get back to :)